CHRISTMAS AT HOME

Link to this week's column atUSAToday.com/travel:

USA Today.com Column

It's hard to believe this is my last Update for
2005, but here we go:
It is a rare treat to be home for the holidays
for any pilot, and it's certainly no exception
for me. Al The Web Guy and I are spending the
entire holiday season at home and enjoying some
time off-sort of. If there's anything worse than
a workaholic at home, it's two workaholics at
home and that describes the two of us,
unfortunately. Still, we're trying to relax at
least a little bit this holiday season.

Once again, Al The Web Guy transformed himself
into Al The Don't-Anybody-Come Near-My-Kitchen
Holiday Chef. He prepared a wonderful Christmas
feast for us and a few of our friends.

One thing I get asked frequently is if flight
crew layovers are long enough to enjoy the cities
where we lay over. Sometimes we do have time,
and other times there is only enough time to get
some sleep before heading out again.

One Christmas, I was in Washington, D.C. where I
had been sent TDY (Temporary Duty) for two
months. The airline had no specified hotel TDY
pilots were supposed to use but there was an
allowance of so many dollars per night-and it
wasn't very much. We could make our own
arrangements using the allowance or let the
airline make them for us to stay in a reasonably
nice hotel.

As it happened, my parents had some friends in
the area whose daughter was a manager at the
Ritz-Carlton near Washington National Airport (it
wasn't called Reagan yet). I arranged a lunch
meeting with her and explained my circumstances
to her, and she graciously offered to give me a
luxury suite for the allotted rate as nobody was
using it anyway during the holiday season. If
anyone reserved the suite, I would simply be
moved to a regular room, but that never happened.

It was much more than I bargained for- far larger
than the apartment I was renting at the time in
Denver. It even came with its own chauffeur.
The Ritz is located in a shopping mall with lots
of restaurants, and below that is the subway
station. I got to know Washington, D. C.
intimately well, from the pandas at the National
Zoo to the Ruby Slippers from the movie "The
Wizard of Oz" at the Smithsonian. There was an
indoor pool, steam room and gym in the hotel. It
was a better than a vacation.

I had no assigned flights but was instead on
reserve, and in the two months I spent there I
got paged to fly a trip exactly one time-I was
doing the White House tour when my beeper went
off and had to cut my tour short to go fly. It
was the one time I used my chauffeur's services
as he was able to get me to the airport very
quickly and the flight was holding for me (the
regular captain started feeling ill after he'd
already checked in for the flight, so there was
no time to spare).

As the chauffeur was helping me out of my Ritz
limousine, a business traveler (by the looks of
him) watched and said very dryly, "No wonder
airfares are up." Oh, well, there was no time to
explain. I felt vaguely as though I'd gotten my
hand caught in the cookie jar.

So I spent Christmas in Washington, D.C. that
year and was treated by the hotel management to a
lavish holiday dinner, which started at around
10:00 AM and was actually a brunch. I've never,
ever, seen such a lavish spread of food in my
life and spent the next few days recovering from
it, but it was one of my more memorable (and
fattening but worth it) Christmas layovers.

When I checked out of the Ritz after two months
of being spoiled beyond belief, I checked with
the management staff to come up with an
appropriate gift for the manager who made it all
possible, and wound up buying her a large box of
Godiva chocolates-her favorite. Small payback
for such a lovely time.

Between Christmas at home and Christmas on the
run, Christmas at home wins, of course. But Al
The Web Guy and Chief Holiday Chef's Christmas
feast reminded me of this other feast a decade
and a half ago.

On another note, one of my pilot colleagues sent
me a cute link, and I thought I'd share it with
you. It's called "For Retired Pilots Only" and
be sure to turn up your volume. It's short but
funny. Cute Video

Finally, for anyone in the San Diego area, I want
to let you know that my friend Norah O'Neill,
first female pilot for Flying Tigers and author
of "Flying Tigress" will be speaking about her
career, reading from her book and signing them at
the San Diego Aerospace Museum at 2001 Pan
American Plaza in Balboa Park on the first
Saturday of 2006, January 7th, at 11:30 AM.
Museum info is at Aerospace Museum
619-234-8291 and information about her book is on
her website Norah ONeill

There is a wax figure of Norah in the museum and
I regret I won't be able to attend this event
myself, but I hope some of my readers will.
Don't forget to give Norah my personal regards if
you do attend. Norah's story and my own have
many similarities, but also some profound
differences, and I encourage you to read her book
if you haven't.

Once again, as a notice to my newest readers and
a reminder to others, my newest book "Flights of
Whimsy - Quips 'N' Quotes" is now out. The retail
price is $11.95 plus just $3 shipping anywhere in
the world. Order four and the fifth one is free,
and there is no additional shipping charge.
Click here to order: Gift Ideas

I've also made autographed copies of my book "The
World At My Feet" available. This book is
$17.95 plus $4.95 shipping and must be ordered through my
Gift Ideas area to include autograph. There is
an area on the order form where you can give me a
name if you'd like the book signed for a
particular individual or if you want a specific
message. Also ships out immediately. Order up
to four books with no additional shipping charge.

Gift Ideas

WINTER HOLIDAY

FROM CAP'N MERYL

Link to this week's column at
USAToday.com/travel:

USA Today.com Column

First a note:

For those of you in the Detroit area, this
Friday, Dec. 23rd, I'll be a guest by phone on
News/Talk Radio 760 AM WRJ Detroit with host John
McCulloch. The interview will start at around
5:00 PM and last for about 30 minutes if you care
to tune in.

Al The Web Guy and I are mostly hiding out this
week. We both have a morbid fear of overcrowded
stores and streets, which is why we live out in
the boonies of rural Colorado in the first place.
We'll be staying home this year for a quiet
Christmas dinner with a few friends and our
house-critters.

Frankly, I don't have much to write about this
week, but at least I can pass on to you a pun so
bad I am happy to report that I didn't make it
up; a reader, another pilot of the female
persuasion, sent this in:

"A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a
hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing
their recent tournament victories. After an hour
had passed, the hotel manager came out of his
office and asked them to disperse. When asked
why, he said "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting
in an open foyer."

Hey, don't blame me-I'm just the messenger.

Questions continue to dribble in regarding the
Southwest accident at Midway. One of the
questions I'm getting the most is why the pilots
didn't do an autoland, meaning why couldn't the
airplane just land itself using autopilot?

An autoland is only performed if the pilots, the
airport and the airplane all meet the standards
to do so. I'm not familiar with Southwest's
fleet of B-737's, but I'm familiar enough with
Midway to know that this airport does not have
autoland capability, in part because of the
relatively short runway. The pilots have to land
the plane themselves and must see the runway in
order to do so (it's not necessary to see the
runway for an autoland).

Another question is, they must have been flying
an ILS (Instrument Landing System) approach, so
why didn't they touch down at the end of the
runway? Contrary to what some think, an ILS
doesn't shoot for the end of the runway, but a
thousand feet down the runway. To touch down on
the very end of the runway the airplane would be
too low to the ground and too close to any
obstructions just before touchdown. The approach
may be conducted most of the way on autopilot,
but the pilots must take over to actually land
the airplane and it's possible to touch down
beyond the desired point.

With nothing of interest beyond that, I'll keep
this Update shorter than most. Before I sign
off, however, I just want you to know that Al The
Web Guy and I, our two boys (ferrets) Charlie
Chopper and Petey, and our Chattering Lory named
Houdini all wish you a completely and politically
correct non-denominational but nevertheless
joyous seasonal holiday. (You can meet us all
at: Photo Gallery and click on
the "At Home" Album.)

In fact, I've come up with just the term with
something for just about everybody. It's choice
D below. Otherwise, please choose the most
correct holiday wish for yourself and be sure to
let me know if I left anyone out.

A. Merry Christmas
B. Happy Hanukkah
C. Happy Kwanzaa
D. Joyous Kwankahmas
E. Happy Festivus to the rest of us (thank you, Seinfeld)

Once again, as a notice to my newest readers and
a reminder to others, my newest book "Flights of
Whimsy - Quips 'N' Quotes" is now out. The
retail price is normally $11.95 plus shipping but
until Christmas you can order it for just $9.95
and I'll throw in shipping for free anywhere in
the world. All orders will be shipped out
immediately but time is growing short if you want
it in time for Christmas.
Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

I've also put autographed copies of my book "The
World At My Feet" on sale until Christmas in the
form of free shipping. Total price is $17.95.
Also ships out immediately.
Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

And with that,
Until Next Time,
Maintain Airspeed!


Cap'n Meryl

www.fromthecockpit.com
www.flyingfearless.com
www.fromthecockpit.com/profile.htm(keynote speaker)

YESTERDAY'S NEWS--AGAIN

Link to this week's column at
USAToday.com/travel:

USA Today.com Column

Notes:

Those of you who ordered "Flights of Whimsy-
Quips 'N' Quotes" will be happy to know the books
finally arrived on Wednesday, Dec. 14th and were
shipped to you the same day. About time! If you
haven't ordered and want to, see notes at the
bottom for more information.

Also, we placed a new link on our Home Page at
http://www.fromthecockpit.com for listening live to ATC.
Those of you who tune in, I wouldn't mind a
little feedback on what you think of this new
link.

Readers who have been with me a long time may
remember an Update I put out last June called
"Yesterday's News" which dealt in part with the
International Dateline. I've never attempted to
try and explain the Dateline in my "Ask The

Captain" column, but after receiving several
questions about it through usatoday.com I finally
decided to tackle it. The link at the top will
take you to this week's column about it if you're
interested and haven't seen it yet.

The original "Yesterday’s News" dealt with a
funny incident that happened when I was a janitor
(yes, a janitor) in Anchorage one winter when I
was laid off from flying. You can find it on my
Blog at Blog. Click on
June 2005 and note it's the last Update for that
month so you'll need to scroll to the bottom.

After I wrote the original "Yesterday's News"
back in June a reader sent me the following:

"It was an astronomer at the Royal Observatory in
Greenwich who allegedly first had the idea of
dividing the world into the 24 time bands. This
eventually resulted in establishing the
International Date Line. He was a Danish
national named Alex Andersrag.

Apparently, the Queen of England was so
impressed, she not only knighted Alex, but named
one of these time zones after him. Today, there
are many people who have heard of Alex Andersrag
Time Band. (Better if said out loud)."

I wanted to include the joke in my column at
usatoday.com but my editor vetoed the idea. I
thought I should at least share it with my own
readers.

Here's what another reader wrote to me just after
the column came out:

"Well before the year 2000 I wrote a piece that
was published in the local paper. In it I talked
about having my wife have twins and then going to
an island in the Pacific so that one could be the
first born in 2000, transport my wife back across
the IDL (International Dateline) so we were back
in 1999 and the other twin could be the last
child born in 1999. (OK, so my male mind isn't
taking into account the pain and experience of
childbirth, but I wrote it purely as a
speculative piece on something that would be
unique; I think my wife's actual response was
"over my dead body"). What one would have are
twins where the one born in the latter year is
actually the older child."

I thought it was an interesting thought, and
especially enjoyed the "over my dead body"
response from his wife.

On another note, I had lots of questions
regarding the Southwest accident at Midway this
week. As always, I feel it's inappropriate to
comment specifically on such events without
waiting for the official findings. I will say
one thing, however. One of our local TV stations
here in the Denver area reported one of four
thrust reversers suspected of malfunctioning.
The B-737 has two engines—one thrust reverser per
engine. My point-and I do have one-is please
don't trust the media.

An interesting note is that reverse thrust is not
used when aircraft are being tested for their
stopping capabilities. However, on a relatively
short runway like Midway, especially on a snowy
night, if one knew in advance of any malfunctions
regarding the landing gear, brakes, reversers,
etc., one would almost certainly divert
elsewhere. Some malfunctions add a "penalty" to
the landing distance, meaning of course, more
runway is required.

Whatever happened on this flight, I believe we'll
find, as is the case in so the majority of
incidents and accidents, that there was more than
one contributing factor. On a nice day, if one
reverser had been discovered to be inoperative
after landing, the chances are good the plane
would have still stopped in time. Add the
element of winter weather and slick runways and
suddenly the chances aren’t so good.

One question I got pertaining to this was whether
I had ever experienced anything really "scary"
myself involving ice and/or snow. The worst
experience I can recall offhand was not on
takeoff or landing in icy conditions, but taxiing
when it was really slick.

Specifically, years ago at O'Hare, I was taxiing
a B-727 on one of the narrow taxiways
perpendicular to a runway and started to slide as
I came around a corner. I couldn't have been
doing more than 3 or 4 knots—just enough to keep
moving. I was able to add just a little bit of
reverse on one side and that stopped the slide.
Cap'n Al—A.K.A. Al The Web Guy-had a similar
experience when he was taxiing a B-727 in slick
conditions.

Landing in snowy conditions with less-than-good
braking can be a little tense sometimes, but it's
really a matter of being concise with airspeed
and not letting the airplane "float" down the
runway (which happens with excess airspeed).
Being careful to be right on speed ensures a
touchdown sooner rather than later, leaving more
runway to get stopped.

Once again, as a notice to my newest readers and
a reminder to others, my newest book "Flights of
Whimsy - Quips 'N' Quotes" is now out. The
retail price is normally $11.95 plus shipping but
until Christmas you can order it for just $9.95
and I'll throw in shipping for free anywhere in
the world. All orders will be shipped out
immediately but time is growing short if you want
it in time for Christmas.

Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

I've also put autographed copies of my book "The
World At My Feet" on sale until Christmas in the
form of free shipping. Total price is $17.95.
Also ships out immediately.

Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

And with that,
Until Next Time,
Maintain Airspeed!


Cap'n Meryl

www.fromthecockpit.com
www.flyingfearless.com
www.fromthecockpit.com/profile.htm(keynote speaker)

FAIRBANKS OR BUST

FROM CAP'N MERYL
Link to this week's column at
USAToday.com/travel:

USA Today.com Column

FAIRBANKS OR BUST

My thanks to the many of you who bought my friend
and fellow airline pilot James Green's book "If
There's One Thing I've Learned" on November 30th.
I hope you'll write to me after you've read it
and let me know what you think of it. I enjoyed
it very much (if I hadn't, I wouldn't have
recommended it.

I am on a hiatus of sorts right now from writing
about airline flying, but I have plenty of fun
stories from my flying history to talk about.
I've never written about one particular adventure
I had so I thought I'd tell that story now:

When I was first hired to fly B-727's, it wasn't
for my current airline but for Wien Air Alaska
which was just starting to operate them for the
first time in 1981. At the time, Wien was the
oldest airline flying continuously under the same
name. "Wien" (pronounced "ween") is a family
name, and to this day I'm in touch with Captain
Merrill Wien (retired), with whom I flew many
trips. Wien Air Alaska went out of business in
1984.

I was hired as a flight engineer and loved my new
and exciting job, but missed not flying as a
pilot. I would eventually upgrade to the copilot
position, first in the B-737 and later in the
B-727. We pilots had plenty of days off so I
would occasionally find an odd flying job. One
of those jobs that came my way was picking up a
Cessna 172 from a church group in Charleston,
South Carolina and delivering it to Fairbanks,
Alaska. The airplane was donated for use in the
Alaskan bush.

I arrived in Charleston on the evening of August
12th, 1982, and immediately took a flight around
the traffic pattern in "my" airplane with a
church representative (also a pilot) to go over
the specifics of this airplane, see if I had any
questions, etc. I had been informed the plane
would not be well-equipped and it wasn't. There
would be no instrument flying (flying in low
visibility with reference only to instruments) or
even night flying. This plane was equipped to
fly only during the daytime, and only in really
clear weather.

I knew this before I left Alaska and came
equipped with my "Captain's Atlas." This
publication is carried by many airline pilots
even today. One of the first spreads in the book
is of the entire freeway system in the U.S.
This was my sole reference for navigation all the
way to the Canadian border north of Montana,
although I also had a book of "plates" (airport
charts) for airports along my planned route of
flight. "IFR" stands for Instrument Flight
Rules, but pilots joke that it really stands for
"I Follow Roads" (or "I Follow Railroads"). It
was no joke on this trip.

After my quick familiarization flight, I had the
airplane fueled, the oil serviced and would be
ready to go at first light. What I didn't count
on was the dense morning fog which delayed me
about three hours. I finally took off into a
clear sky and flew as far as Chattanooga,
Tennessee before I decided to stop for a break
and some fuel. From there I continued to St.
Louis. Thunderstorms set in late in the day and
I could go no further, but it was time to stop
anyway. Total flight time that day was 8 hours
and 42 minutes-enough for one day.

I spent the night at the St. Louis Hyatt Regency.
I was on an expense account and my hosts told me
to live it up as I was charging them almost
nothing for my time to deliver the airplane. As
far as I was concerned, it was a paid vacation.
I was entitled to an airline discount because of
my airline job with Wien and the front desk was
quite curious about how I wound up there, so I
told them a little about myself, my job in
Alaska, and how I came to be flying such a little
plane by myself all the way across the country.

They seemed enthralled and gave me a suite. I
paid something like $38 for a room that went for
a few hundred dollars per night. I wondered
about my other stops along the way, and whether I
would be treated this well everywhere. I was in
for a pleasant time of it. In some cases my
accommodations were luxurious, at a few stops
quite rustic, but I was always welcomed warmly.

The next morning it was foggy again and I got
another late start; then thunderstorms appeared
again in the afternoon. I made it only as far as
Kansas City and went downtown to the Hyatt
Regency there, where I mentioned my stay the
previous night in St. Louis at the same hotel
chain. They were equally curious, and once again
I was treated to a lavish suite at my discounted
airline rate. Years later, I would stay here
again with my current airline, not only at the
same hotel, but once in the identical kind of
suite which we flight crews sometimes get when
our hotels are otherwise full. Flight time that
day was logged at just 3 hours, 43 minutes due to
the long-lasting fog in the morning and the
early afternoon thunderstorms.

The next night was spent at North Platte,
Nebraska, after just 4 hours and 23 minutes of
flight time. Every day it was pretty much the
same story with fog in the morning and
thunderstorms in the afternoon, limiting my air
time. The next day I made a fuel stop in
Sheridan, Wyoming and made a side trip to visit
the Sheridan Inn, former home of Buffalo Bill
Cody. I then continued my flight to Great Falls,
Montana, where I overnighted once again.

From there I headed up into Canada and joined the
Alcan (Alaska Canada) Highway for most of the
rest of my trip. This is where I put away my
trusty freeway map and switched over to using a
book a friend of mine had given me before I'd
left. It was a book especially for pilots flying
the Alcan with the entire layout, including some
pictures of places recommended for overnight
stops. The pictures were of the road itself,
mostly unpaved at that time, and had notations
like, "When you see the large windmill just on
the right side of the road as you're flying
north, fly about another five miles until you see
the lake—that's Watson Lake and a good place to
make a fuel stop."

Another notation was something like this: "Don't
be surprised if you find yourself going south by
the compass while flying northbound along the
highway—there are several sharp curves that can
cause this seeming disparity, but the "wrong"
heading only lasts for a very few miles." That
book was my security blanket. There's no way I
would have believed my route was correct if I'd
seen a southerly heading without being warned of
this anomaly.

My first overnight stops in Canada were in
Calgary and Dawson Creek. The next day I made
fuel stops at Ft. Nelson and Watson Lake with an
overnight stay at Whitehorse in the Yukon
Territories. There I saw the largest weathervane
in the world-an actual DC-3 on a stone mount. I
saw it years later from the air at 35,000 feet
flying from Denver to Anchorage in the Airbus
with my current airline. I wasn't sure we'd be
able to see it from that high up, but we could
and I pointed it out to our passengers.
This link will take you to an article about it
along with some photos:

Worlds Largest Weather Vane
After Whitehorse came my first Alaskan stop at
Northway for fuel, after which I finally arrived
in Fairbanks. My takeoff from South Carolina had
been on August 13, 1982 and my journey's end was
on August 20th. Total flight time was 43. 6
hours over eight days.

To my immense regret I didn't keep a journal of
this flight other than my logbook (the very one I
nearly lost as recounted in the chapter called
"Wingwalker" in "The World At My Feet"), in which
I made a few notes, but I remember it as one of
the most enjoyable experiences of my life. I
took a great deal of satisfaction from safely
piloting a plane alone such a great distance and
having to navigate it all completely visually.

I was 31 years old when I took this flight-the
longest solo journey of my flying career and one
I'll never forget. My thanks to you for
indulging me and coming along on my little flight
down Memory Lane, so to speak


For my newest readers and as a reminder to others, I've put autographed copies of my book "The
World At My Feet" on sale until Christmas in the
form of free shipping. Total price is $17.95.
Ships within a day or two.
Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

Also, my newest book "Flights of Whimsy - Quips'N' Quotes" will be out soon.
The retail price will be $11.95 plus shipping but until Christmas you can order it for just $9.95 and I'll throw in shipping for free. My printer recently informed me my book will be in my hands by December 15th/16th. This is a month later than the original estimate.
I will ship all orders out immediately upon
receipt so you should still have them in time for Christmas.

Click here to order: Gift Ideas

And with that,

Until Next Time,
Maintain Airspeed!
Cap'n Meryl
www.fromthecockpit.com
www.flyingfearless.com
www.fromthecockpit.com/profile.htm
(keynote speaker information)