WINTER HOLIDAY

FROM CAP'N MERYL

Link to this week's column at
USAToday.com/travel:

USA Today.com Column

First a note:

For those of you in the Detroit area, this
Friday, Dec. 23rd, I'll be a guest by phone on
News/Talk Radio 760 AM WRJ Detroit with host John
McCulloch. The interview will start at around
5:00 PM and last for about 30 minutes if you care
to tune in.

Al The Web Guy and I are mostly hiding out this
week. We both have a morbid fear of overcrowded
stores and streets, which is why we live out in
the boonies of rural Colorado in the first place.
We'll be staying home this year for a quiet
Christmas dinner with a few friends and our
house-critters.

Frankly, I don't have much to write about this
week, but at least I can pass on to you a pun so
bad I am happy to report that I didn't make it
up; a reader, another pilot of the female
persuasion, sent this in:

"A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a
hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing
their recent tournament victories. After an hour
had passed, the hotel manager came out of his
office and asked them to disperse. When asked
why, he said "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting
in an open foyer."

Hey, don't blame me-I'm just the messenger.

Questions continue to dribble in regarding the
Southwest accident at Midway. One of the
questions I'm getting the most is why the pilots
didn't do an autoland, meaning why couldn't the
airplane just land itself using autopilot?

An autoland is only performed if the pilots, the
airport and the airplane all meet the standards
to do so. I'm not familiar with Southwest's
fleet of B-737's, but I'm familiar enough with
Midway to know that this airport does not have
autoland capability, in part because of the
relatively short runway. The pilots have to land
the plane themselves and must see the runway in
order to do so (it's not necessary to see the
runway for an autoland).

Another question is, they must have been flying
an ILS (Instrument Landing System) approach, so
why didn't they touch down at the end of the
runway? Contrary to what some think, an ILS
doesn't shoot for the end of the runway, but a
thousand feet down the runway. To touch down on
the very end of the runway the airplane would be
too low to the ground and too close to any
obstructions just before touchdown. The approach
may be conducted most of the way on autopilot,
but the pilots must take over to actually land
the airplane and it's possible to touch down
beyond the desired point.

With nothing of interest beyond that, I'll keep
this Update shorter than most. Before I sign
off, however, I just want you to know that Al The
Web Guy and I, our two boys (ferrets) Charlie
Chopper and Petey, and our Chattering Lory named
Houdini all wish you a completely and politically
correct non-denominational but nevertheless
joyous seasonal holiday. (You can meet us all
at: Photo Gallery and click on
the "At Home" Album.)

In fact, I've come up with just the term with
something for just about everybody. It's choice
D below. Otherwise, please choose the most
correct holiday wish for yourself and be sure to
let me know if I left anyone out.

A. Merry Christmas
B. Happy Hanukkah
C. Happy Kwanzaa
D. Joyous Kwankahmas
E. Happy Festivus to the rest of us (thank you, Seinfeld)

Once again, as a notice to my newest readers and
a reminder to others, my newest book "Flights of
Whimsy - Quips 'N' Quotes" is now out. The
retail price is normally $11.95 plus shipping but
until Christmas you can order it for just $9.95
and I'll throw in shipping for free anywhere in
the world. All orders will be shipped out
immediately but time is growing short if you want
it in time for Christmas.
Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

I've also put autographed copies of my book "The
World At My Feet" on sale until Christmas in the
form of free shipping. Total price is $17.95.
Also ships out immediately.
Click here to order:
Gift Ideas

And with that,
Until Next Time,
Maintain Airspeed!


Cap'n Meryl

www.fromthecockpit.com
www.flyingfearless.com
www.fromthecockpit.com/profile.htm(keynote speaker)